Of Roses and Angels
by ArenynCai
Summary: this is my first angst fic. Set in 1482, the year of Mistress Rose's death. The book never really tells us how Sam feels about it but i came up with an idea. Chapter 2 up. please R+R. thanx!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: HEEEEEY!!!!! Haven't seen you guys in a long long long .etc. time! Well since school has started and got my brain juices flowing, I've finally written a fic. It might be a wee bit short but I'm working on it. I'm not that good at writing angst stuff when I'm not feeling angst. As you have read in the summary this is about Sam and how he is feels about Rosie's death. Ok I'm just so anxious to start writing this so I'll shut up now.  
  
Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me. They belong to the man of Middle-earth, JRR Tolkien.  
  
  
  
Of Roses and Angels Chapter 1  
  
It was September 3rd, 3 days after Rose Gamgee's death. Her funeral was held under the mallorn tree, the same place where she and Sam were wedded. All 13 of their children came plus the good friends of Sam, Merry and Pippin. Since Midsummer Day, the day that Rosie had died, Sam had not eaten, slept, or spoken. One day slowly faded into the next.  
  
Sam watched as Rosie's coffin was being buried. His grief was too strong for tears to express. He felt as if his heart was being buried with Rosie six feet into the cold damp ground. Sam let out a long sigh and bowed his head. His youngest daughter, Robin, put an arm around him, drying her tears with a handkerchief. He closed his eyes remembering the night before Rosie's death.  
  
~*~*~*~*  
  
Sam watched as his wife was brushing her hair before she got into bed. He was mesmerized by how beautiful she was, despite her silver curls and the laugh lines on her fair face that have developed over the years. She looked up at him, the light from the candles making her brown eyes twinkle like the stars in a Lothlorien. She smiled back at him and a lump formed in Sam's throat. He smiled back.  
  
"She's more beautiful than Lady Galadriel," he thought to himself.  
  
"What is the matter, Sam?" asked Rosie.  
  
Tears stung the corners of Sam's eyes. "Nothing," he managed to whisper.  
  
"You haven't said much in the past hour." She held out her hand. "Tell me what's on the mind of yours."  
  
Sam walked over, sat down next to Rosie on the bed, and took her delicate hands in his. He brought them to his lips and kissed them. Rosie's face turned serious.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
Sam laughed softly. "Nothing," he replied again. "Well.we've been married for little more than 62 wonderful years, raised and survived 13 children and as each day passed I loved you more than I had the day before. As my love grew so did your beauty, both on the outside and the inside. You are more than I have ever wanted in my life." He placed his hand on her cheek. Rosie turned her head to kiss his palm.  
  
"That must've been one of the most beautiful things you've ever said to me. What took you so long," she added playfully.  
  
They both laughed. Sam looked down. When he looked back up, Rosie kissed his forehead.  
  
"I love you, Samwise."  
  
Sam wouldn't hold back his emotions and let his tears fall.  
  
"And I love you. I always will," he whispered.  
  
Rosie climbed into bed and under the covers. Sam changed into his nightclothes and then came up behind Rosie, wrapping his arms around her waist. He kissed her curls.  
  
"Good night, Sam"  
  
"Good night.my dearest Rose."  
  
~*~*~*~*  
  
Sam looked up. Everybody was already preparing to leave. Red, sniffling faces came up and hugged Sam before leaving in their carts. Pippin and Merry stayed behind.  
  
Pippin went up to Sam and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Are you going to be alright," asked Pippin. His eyes were also red from crying. He couldn't stand seeing his best friend so depressed.  
  
Sam nodded but didn't say anything.  
  
"Are you sure? You can come by Brandyhall or the Took smial if you don't feel well," offered Merry.  
  
Sam shook his head slowly.  
  
Pippin and Merry look at each other and shrugged their shoulders.  
  
"Take care, Sam," said Pippin.  
  
"We'll come by Bag End to check up on you in the morning," said Merry. They walked to their carts and rode off, looking back to see Sam still standing before the burial mound.  
  
Sam bowed his head. He remembered the morning on Midsummer Day. He remembered waking up with Rosie still in his arms.  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
"Good morning, Rose. It's Midsummer Day. We have to get up for the celebrations." Sam bent over to kiss Rosie. He found her cheek to be surprisingly cold.  
  
"R-.Rosie?" Sam put his ear closely to her mouth. He didn't feel any air. He slowly moved his head down to her chest and listened closely for her heartbeat. Sam sat upright looking down at Rosie, his eyes wide with shock.  
  
"No.Rosie. Wake up," he whispered through his tears. "Please wake up." He picked up her head gently, rocking back and forth, and praying silently. "No, Rosie. Rose." Sam kissed the top of Rosie's head, almost naively thinking this would bring her back. Drops of tears fell from Sam's brown eyes, falling onto Rosie's hair. Blinded by his tears, Sam lowered Rosie's head onto the pillow. He closed his eyes, not bearing to see Rosie's lifeless body lie there. He shook his head hard. "Maybe it's all a dream. A horrible, horrible dream." He slowly opened one eye. It wasn't a dream. Sam couldn't bear thinking about the future without Rosie, the lass he's loved since.since even before he could remember.  
  
His mind now numb with grief, he walked outside onto the steps. He sat on the steps, buried his face into his hands and sobbed.  
  
~*~*~*~*  
  
Sam slowly walked away from the burial mound and across the field toward Bag End. When he got to Bag End, everything was silent and still. In his mind, he could see Rosie standing at the table preparing the table for supper. He could still hear her melodious voice. He could still smell her perfume, which, of course, smelt of roses. "A rose for a Rose," Sam had said when he presented her the bottle for her birthday the year after their wedding. Sam sighed as he walked to his room. He took off his vest and lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He closed his eyes slowly and drifted off into a lonely slumber.  
  
  
  
A/N: Ok this might not be any good. But that's my opinion! What's yours? The only way for me to know is if you review! It might be awhile before I update so please hang in there. 


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: HULLO!!!!!! I'm ungrounded and ready to conquer the internet!!! And to celebrate my ungroundingness I will release the 2nd chapter of this story to all of you faithful readers. So here it is!  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Prof. JRR Tolkien.( even thought sometimes I might borrow them when I'm bored)  
  
  
  
The next evening Sam gloomily walked out of Bag End. He trimmed off a rose from the rose-bush growing under the parlor window. He stared a the half- opened flower and let out a heavy sigh. With a slight shake of his head he headed toward the mallorn tree in the field across from Bag End. Each step was more miserable than the previous and to every step a heavy tear fell from his puffy, red eyes. He finally made it to the tree, to where Rosie was buried. Sam's hand shook as he placed the rose on the ground above where Rosie was lying. He sat down, put his hands over his face, and wept.  
  
"Why, Rosie? Why'd you have to leave me?" he whispered between sobs. A small gust of wind blew across Sam's face as he took a small carving knife from his pocket and hesitantly put it to his left wrist. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and prepared for the release from his grieving and loneliness.  
  
"Because it was time," answered a whispery voice behind him.  
  
Sam wheeled around. He couldn't see anybody nor did he hear anyone follow him to the tree. He stood still, confused, and out of the corner of his eye he saw a dim spark of light He dropped his knife, turned his head slowly, and before him he saw a faint outline of a woman.  
  
"It can't be an elf. It's not tall enough," Sam thought to himself. The apparition's features grew stronger. Sam gasped when he saw the spirit's face. It was Rosie.  
  
Sam's legs gave out and he fell to his knees. He tried to speak but everything came out as a hoarse whisper. He closed his eyes and took in deep breaths. He looked up to find Rosie standing there smiling down at him.  
  
"Hullo, Sam my dear," she said.  
  
"Wh-Rosie? Is.is that really you?"  
  
"Yes, of course, love! I've come back for one last good-bye." She sat down in front of Sam.  
  
"I miss you so much," wept Sam. "It hurts me to think about living what I have left of my life without you." Sam breathed a shuddering sigh accompanied with a shower of tears.  
  
"Oh no, Sam. Please.don't cry. It grieves me so to see you like this. Don't' be sad."  
  
"I can't help it! I want you back, back alive here with me! And since it looks like I cant make that happen, I've decided to come to you, instead." Sam glanced at the knife on the ground.  
  
"No! Sam, you musn't kill yourself!"  
  
"Why not? I need to be with you! I need to!"  
  
"But you are with me! You always have been!" She reached out to the rose on the ground. Sam's eyes followed her hand as she put the rose to her lips and lightly kissed the petals. He watched in amazement as the flower slowly bloomed in her hand. It shone with the faintest blue light. Rosie handed the rose to Sam.  
  
"And if you take this rose everywhere with you," she said, "wherever you will go, my arms will be embracing you, my hands caressing you face. Then that way I will forever be with you until we meet in the heavens."  
  
Sam's breath was completely taken away by the beauty of his rose. Never has he seen anything so beautiful it was frightening, save the Lady of Lothlorien. Sam looked up at Rosie, at her shimmering aura. He suddenly didn't feel sad anymore. He felt comforted and prepared to take on the future. Sam reached his hand out hesitantly to Rosie's cheek. Although there was nothing there but air he somehow could feel the warmth of her cheek as if there was flesh under his touch. A silver teardrop fell from Rosie's eyes onto Sam's hand. It disappeared almost instantly. Rosie leaned over, brushed away Sam's white curls and kissed his forehead.  
  
"Good-bye, Sam. Remember, your time is still far away. People who love you need you more here soon in the future. You've known me to be a patient lass and I haven't changed. I won't mind the long wait. Good-bye." A gust of wind blew and Rosie disappeared into a wisp of white dust.  
  
Sam watched the last grain of dust float into the sky until it looked like another one of the stars in the black night sky. He looked down at the flower in his hands. Wearily he stood up, never taking his eyes of the rose, and walked back to Bag End. Sam sat down in the parlor and thought long and hard about what Rosie said. Several hours had passed and he grew sleepy. Sam put his head down on the desk with the flower by his face and slept peacefully.  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: does this chapter seem a wee bit shorter than the last? Oh well. I might continue this story but I'm still trying to decide because I might not have time with all my final exams coming up in a month. Ok, well.please review! Thank you! (rhyme!) 


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